eHarmony Review 2016 :: Christian Singles Tell It Like It Is

eHarmony ReviewOur eHarmony Review Bottom Line:

  • GOOD: One of the oldest and largest online dating sites.
  • BAD: You have less control on eHarmony than you do on other sites.
  • TAKEAWAY: We think you’re more likely to find like-minded Christian matches on eHarmony than on any other online dating site.

Before we started this whole Best Christian Dating Sites review process, we would’ve bet that more Christians have tried eHarmony than any of the other sites.

In fact, when most (married) people pat us on the arm and ask us if we’ve tried online dating, they don’t even use the term “online dating.” They say, “Have you thought about getting on eHarmony?” It’s the go-to site.

So we decided to do an eHarmony review first. Because, well, the members of the SingleRoots team have tried it, and a lot of our friends have, too.

And our initial research indicated that of the people we interviewed, more of them had tried eHarmony than any other Christian dating site. While people might dislike it, we’ve found it seems to be a site that more of us are comfortable with—flaws and all.

Maybe it’s the fact that our profiles aren’t thrown into a sea of other profiles where everyone and their brother or sister has access to it. Or, maybe it’s the fact that it was founded by Dr. Neil Clark Warren, a man who’s supposedly on “our” team, and we trust “our” people, even if their company isn’t explicitly “Christian.” (Christians jump on Christian bandwagons? Never.)

Then again, it could just be that it’s one of the industry leaders and one of the first to market itself to Christians. For whatever reason, we don’t think it’s too much of an overgeneralization to say that a lot of Christians try eHarmony first.

But none of those reasons are why it scored so well in our rating of the Best Christian Dating Sites. We thought we’d do an eHarmony review to explain why it did score so highly.

eHarmony Review :: Pros

  • The site is easy to use. It has a modern, clean feel to it, and it doesn’t take a college degree in computers to figure out how to navigate it. There aren’t a lot of extra bells and whistles to eHarmony that you find on other sites. While some may see this as a “con,” when compared with how confusing those others’ bells and whistles can be, we see it as refreshing.
  • Finding like-minded Christians on other sites can be like finding a needle in a haystack sometimes. Depending on the site, you might have to read a lot of text on a lot of profiles to decide if someone calls him/herself a “Christian” in name only or if he/she loves the Lord wholeheartedly and lives to serve Him. While eHarmony is not perfect, there’s something to be said for their 29 Dimensions of Compatibility testing (as lengthy as it may be). That, combined with stricter setting options for choosing how important commonalities in faith are with your matches, help give eHarmony a slight edge in this department.
  • Another pro is the very thing we mentioned above: the sheer number of people on the site. It’s one of the biggest online dating sites and chances are, you’re not going to run out of matches anytime soon with as many new members as they add daily. When it comes to dating, can you really have too many options? Exactly.
  • However, if you do find yourself lacking in matches, eHarmony offers 2 additional options: Flex Matches and “What If?” Flex Matches offer you the profiles of people who fit some of your criteria, but not all. Those matches are labeled as flex matches and are a different color than your traditional matches. eHarmony has also implemented a subscriber-only feature called, “What If?” It allows you view up to 30 eHarmony members beyond your matches. They’re people who are compatible with you, but not listed in your matches section yet. If you’re interested, though, you can turn them into matches and move forward into the communication process. If you’re not interested, keep moving.
  • eHarmony also offers guided communication to get people started communicating. You begin by selecting short answer questions from a list eHarmony provides. Once you both send/answer those, you send a list of your 10 Must-Haves in a partner, as well as 10 Deal Breakers. Those are followed by 3 short answer questions (either ones you choose from a list or ones you’ve created). After the short answer questions are completed, if you still want to proceed, you then arrive into Open Communication (emailing) within the eHarmony system.If it’s something you don’t want to do, you can opt out and go straight into Open Communication. For those who are pros, going through the process can get annoying every single time you communicate with a new match, but it’s a nice feature for newbies who are a bit nervous about the World of Online Dating.
  • If you read the fine print, you can get a 3-Day Free Trial. (We show you how here.)

eHarmony Review :: Cons

  • eHarmony can be slightly expensive when signing up for one month only. $59.95 ain’t cheap. But they do offer discounts if you buy in bulk–not Costco bulk, but more than one-month-at-a-time bulk. And again, if you read the fine print, there’s a way to ease your buying decision by understanding how to test drive it for free for 3 days.
  • One of our biggest complaints is that if someone is not a paying member, you have no way of knowing. So, while eHarmony has a ton of members, they also have a ton of non-paying ones as well. That profile with the cute guy/girl who leaks Jesus and seems like the perfect match for you? Well, he/she may or may not be able to communicate with you because he/she may or may not still be a member. This is a big detractor, but we can’t dock eHarmony too much in this area since it is not the only site that allows this to occur. Some other online dating sites will tell you how recently a match has logged in, though. For instance, in the last 24 hours, last week, last 3 weeks, or last 3 months. That feature is extremely helpful before attempting to communicate with someone, and it’s definitely a feature we wish eHarmony had. However, if you decide to shell out major bucks and get their premier membership, they’ll allow you to communicate with anyone–even non-paying members.
  • The other issue that most people have is the inability to see the entire database of eHarmony profiles. This isn’t a problem if you believe slow and steady wins the race since eHarmony sends you up to 7 profiles daily for your review. But if you’re a marathon dater…well, marathon daters aren’t taking the time to read this post anyway, so never mind.

eHarmony Review :: How Much Money Are We Talking About Here?

Who cares about pros and cons, right? You’re really here to talk about the bottom line—how much money this is going to cost you. As we mentioned in the section above, if you only purchase a one month, it’s going to run around $60. However, the price per month goes down considerably the more months you sign up for.

eHarmony Review Price

It’s hard to pin down exact pricing on eHarmony because they offer different prices to different people, depending on if you’re a new customer or if they’re trying to lure an old user back into the online dating world. We’ve seen prices run around $40/month for a 6-month membership and we’ve seen it go as low as $10/month for a 24-month membership. If you purchase longer-term plans, they’ll offer you option to pay in 3 installments too. (The screenshot above is the example of pricing that was given to a new, first-time user.)

eHarmony Review :: Our Recommendation

With all that said, in our unbiased and impartial opinion, we think that eHarmony is the best Christian dating site for your buck right now. Even though eHarmony can run slightly more than its competitors like Match or Christian Mingle, we still rank it higher than them. This isn’t a rating that we take lightly, but from our surveys, research, and the anecdotes we hear from Christian singles, eHarmony tends to be the best option for serious, marriage-minded adults.

The most up-to-date, best deals out there for eHarmony memberships are linked at the bottom of this article. If you decide to move forward in setting up an account, scroll to the bottom, and click on the one that works best for you. It’ll open up eHarmony in a separate window and then you can follow our instructions below to walk you through the sign-up process. No, the sign-up process isn’t hard, but we’ve added some Pro Tips to help you out along the way.

eHarmony Review :: How to Set-up an eHarmony Account

The only thing you’ll need to set up your eHarmony account—besides your credit card—is a valid email address.

You can follow our instructions below for setting up your account, or you can watch this quick video:

[Pro Tip: If you feel like you’re drowning in emails already, create a separate email account to house your online dating account(s). That way they’re not mixed in with your more important emails, and when you receive a notification in your inbox about that account, you’ll know it only has to do with online dating.]

The eHarmony account set-up process takes a good 15-20 minutes at least, so be prepared to set aside some time as you can’t save it and go back to it.

eHarmony Review 1

Basic Information
The first thing eHarmony will do is ask for your name, if you’re seeking a man or a woman, and your zip code. And then they’ll tease you by telling you how many matches are in your area. For the purposes of our research, we used a generic Dallas zip code and were told there were over 30,000 men in our area. (Eureka! Here’s my credit card!) See, they know what they’re doing over there at eHarmony.

Personality Profile Assessment: Multiple Choice Section
Of course they’ll start with the basics: gender, age, marital status, number of kids, etc. They’ll even ask if you know someone who’s been successful on the site or if you’ve ever used online dating yourself.

eHarmony Review 2

Then you’ll shift into the personality assessment. They’ll give you adjectives like “warm,” “stable,” and “generous” and ask how much those words describe you. They’ll also ask you for adjectives that your friends would use to describe you. Sure it takes some time, but the introspection that occurs while taking the assessment can be helpful and maybe a little sobering.

eHarmony will ask you about statements you identify with, along with feelings you might’ve encountered over the past month. They’ll also ask what you’re good at, what you like to do, your skill set, and your interests.

eHarmony Review 3

And don’t worry, if you answer too quickly ole eHarmony will police you and slow you down. This is a hugely important self-assessment, you know. Your future marriage could depend on it!

For those who are concerned about finding like-minded Christians, it’s important to note that the assessment includes questions about your religious beliefs, as well as sexual activity.

Earlier in this eHarmony review, we mentioned that eHarmony is a bit better than other sites when it comes to finding matches who are believers. Here’s where that happens: You’re allowed to specify the religions and denominations that you want to be matched with. You’re also asked how important your match’s religion is—not at all, somewhat important, or very important. These restrictions help their algorithm to better know that your relationship with Christ is important to you.

eHarmony Review 4

[Pro Tip: Latter-Day Saints is the same thing as the Mormon church. Neither Latter-Day Saints nor Jehovah’s Witnesses are Christian. Just know that if you choose to not specify a denomination, not everything listed under “Christian” is truly Christian.]

eHarmony Review 5

Short Answer Questions
Once you finish the multiple-choice section, you’ll move onto the short answers that will be included in your actual profile. If you leave them blank, eHarmony won’t include them in your profile, but if you want to change them later, you’ll be able to edit them at any time.

[Pro Tip: Take your time on these answers. Be as creative and sincere as possible, as these answers will set your profile apart from other matches. Don’t leave too many blank because full profiles are a good way for your matches to gain a better understanding of whether or not you’re a good candidate for them. And if you think grammar doesn’t matter to your matches, think again. A recent Wall Street Journal article stated that 75% of  men and 88% of women judge a date on their grammar, second only to personal hygiene.]

Profile Picture
We’ve said it a million times outside of this eHarmony review but it bears repeating: Choose your photos wisely. Guys, stop it with the (shirtless) mirror selfies. Girls, stop it with the duck faces. If you don’t have good, normal photos of yourself, then ask a trusted friend to take some for you. (But don’t post 5 shots of you in your backyard taken in one 10 minute span: This is me next to the tree, this is me on the back porch, this is me next to another tree, this is me by the back fence, this is me by the back fence with a hat on.)

If you don’t want to ask a trusted friend, you can import photos from Facebook. This is a good option because many of us have been tagged in others’ photos and this allows you to get them without having to ask for them.

eHarmony Review 6

Give Them Your Money
The next step is the hard sell. eHarmony will show you all of the plans, as well as pricing for your membership. Remember: You won’t be able to see any of your matches’ photos without a paying membership. You can read their profiles, but you can’t view the pics.

eHarmony offers Total Connect Plans which is a premium, but it costs more than Basic Plans. It just depends on how secure you want your account. Total Connect will ensure your matches that you are who you say you are. It also gives you access to the Secure Phone Call feature.

eHarmony Review 7

[Pro Tip: At first glance, you won’t see an option for less than a 3-month membership. If you scroll to the bottom of the price plan chart, you’ll see “Full Price Plan.” If you click on it, more small print will drop down with the option of a 1-month membership for $59.95. Like we mentioned earlier in this eHarmony review, that’s pricey. Committing to more than a month will save you money, but this is a valid option for those who just want to try it out.]

eHarmony Review 8

[Another Pro Tip: At first glance, it will appear as if you can’t move forward on the eHarmony site without purchasing a plan. If you click on the eHarmony logo in the top left hand corner, it will take you to the full site.

eHarmony Review 9

Remember, as mentioned before, you won’t be able to see your matches’ photos without paying, but if you want to check things out before paying, clicking on the logo will take you there. Don’t worry: They’ll hound you about becoming a subscriber, so you’ll always find a link to pay for a membership if you decide to move forward.]

eHarmony Review :: How to Close Your eHarmony Account When You’ve Found the Love of Your Life

So what if you are one of the lucky ones and you find the love of your life on eHarmony? Or what if you need to just take a little break from online dating? For whatever reason, people sometimes you need to cut ties and some want to do so permanently. It’s important to note that, if you’re a paying subscriber, your account will close when the time period that you have paid for runs out. They will not refund partial memberships.

[Pro Tip: Before your account is permanently closed, go in and delete all of your photos from your account. Since you won’t have access to check it or delete them later, it’s a good rule of thumb to take them down beforehand. It’s just a safeguard to put in place just in case.]

Whether you’re a paying member of eHarmony or not, the process for closing your account is the same:

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Go to your Settings and then to your Account Settings. Under “Billing,” there should be a somewhat obscure option to “Close Account” or “Cancel My Subscription” (for paying members). It’s not highlighted, and it’s easy to miss.

If you’re a paying member, you’ll need to cancel your subscription, which means that you’ll be able to use your account until your paid subscription runs out. If you’re on a payment plan, you will not be able to close your account until you have paid the money you’ve agreed to pay.

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eHarmony will then ask you if you’re sure this is something you want to do. They’ll remind you that you’ll lose all of your matches, along with your communication with those matches. But most importantly, you’ll have to retake the lengthy personality assessment if you want to re-join in the future.

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Remember: If you are a paid subscriber, your account will close after the period you’ve paid for is completed. Until then, you can use the account as usual.

[Pro Tip: If you just want to take a break and not delete everything, you can go into your Settings, then Match Settings, and tell eHarmony to quit sending you new matches. That will pause your account until you tell it to start sending them again. That won’t stop any matches you already have from communicating with you, but it will keep you from having to endure the set-up process again. If you’re a paying member, you also need to go into your Account Settings, then into Billing, and turn off the Auto-renewal feature so you won’t be billed again until you’re ready to pick back up as a paying member.]

Special Link: Get 60% Off a 6-Month Membership at with code EHCODE

Or first read how to take advantage of their 3-Day free trial.

Current Online Dating Coupons & Offers:

eHarmony (USA Offers):

eHarmony (Canada Offers):

eHarmony (UK Offers): (USA Offers): (UK Offers):

Christian Cafe:

Christian Crush:

Last updated: 7/20/2016

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When Will I Get Married? Plus, 8 Other Questions that Plague Singles

  • My best friend met her fiance on eHarmony. They’re getting married this July. Before that, her older sister met her husband on eHarmony. So of course I’ve tried it. In the beginning I liked it. It actually matched me with the husband of a friend of mine (whoops – his account shouldn’t have still been active!) so I knew it was matching me with the right kind of people. I met someone via the site that it ended up not working out with.. but regardless I signed up for another 3 month subscription. (they almost always have coupons/specials to get subscriptions for $15-$20 a month – just hunt for them!)

    The second go-round I wasn’t as impressed. After a month I got fewer and fewer matches each day (if any) and those I did get were mostly duds. Men who were OBVIOUSLY not even claiming to be Christians in their profiles, or who scarcely mentioned the name of God. I felt like I was still looking for a needle in a haystack regardless of those 29 dimensions. Really? If we don’t have Christ in common what do all those other areas of compatibility matter?

    I also had a subscription to Christian Cafe. I’d joined with a free subscription at first. And I didn’t like the format much. Browsing profiles and giving ANYONE the ability to browse mine or contact me didn’t appeal much. But I liked that it was easier to sort out denominations.

    Regardless of my reservations, I was contacted on Christian Cafe by a wonderful Christian man who I will be meeting in the next couple of weeks. So it can work!

    • SingleRoots Team

      You’re right, Bekah, it is nice to be able to sort out denominations on Christian Cafe, but you can do that on eHarmony, too, in your settings. You can also place the level of importance at “very” and that usually helps with the results. The format of Christian Cafe is the biggest reason we have a hard time recommending it over eHarmony. It’s so cluttered and difficult to maneuver.

      How exciting that you’re meeting someone! Good luck!

      • Guest

        ChristianCafe had less than 10 men in my age range in my city. ChristianMingle has many more than that. I don’t know why, but being able to sort by denominations doesn’t mean much when you only have 7 profiles to choose from anyway….

    • Mary

      I’ve been on eharmony for years. Originally tried to fill out the profile and it said I was not campatible! I paid for months and months at a time and had 1 date with a guy I’m fairly sure isn’t a Christian, and that was within a few weeks of signing up. I only ever get emails on free communication weekends. I live in a big city…

      • ryanmarcantonio

        Sounds like my experience

  • Ryan S.

    I can think of 4 Christian couples I know that met online and are now married — they all met on eHarmony.

    • Guest

      Ryan: what were their ages, etc? What match settings did they use? I’ve been on eH for over a week now, and they have sent me 0 matches – and I live in a reasonbly-sized college city/town. There should be loads of singles in my area, but none are on eH? There must be something wrong with their match system or algorithms or something, or I’m just not filling out the questions right.

  • The problem I’ve been having recently with eHarmony is that I get no matches. Literally. A week or two go by and I don’t get one match. How lame is that? My “requirements” are not too picky (a Christian and a non-murderer?), and I live in a big city (Washington, D.C.!). What gives, eHarmony? I wish there was a way to cancel my membership if I don’t get any new matches over a certain amount of time. Otherwise, what am I paying for???

    • SingleRoots Team

      We think you’re asking a bit much for a non-murderer. Come now, Ruth. 😉

      Most of the time, people who live in a smaller town with narrowed distance settings run into the lessening matches problem, but with you living in the DC area, that is a BIG negative.

      Did you pay for several months in advance? Have you emailed them to ask about it?

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. We want to hear the good and bad so that people can make the most informed decisions.

    • Guest

      AMEN Ruth. I live in a smaller city than you do, but it’s a pretty large college town, so there should be loads of singles here. eH has sent me 0 matches in over a week, but they keep asking me to pay them to subscribe. Subscribe for what? For more weeks of zero matches? It makes no sense.

      Have you tried ChristianMingle? Or ChristianCafe? I found few matches in my area on ChristianCafe, but there are many more on ChristianMingle. Maybe it varies by city or state?

  • butterfly

    I’d like the sites to only show matches for my saved filter. Exclude out of state, etc. Eharmony interface (mobile droid or web) is terrible. Too cumbersome to scroll a lot of “matches that are not a match. The service is too expensive for showing members that cannot communicate. Also, the recently deleted the closed folder so if you accidentally close someone you cant get access to reverse. For saving resources, they should only show true matches of active members and keep the closed with periodic mandatory delete.also have an option to view “inactive member” matches.

  • Inquisitive

    I struggle to accept e-harmony at any level due to immorality being advocated by the owner, Neil Clark Warren. Rather than fight the homosexual agenda, he caved to it, and formed a “branch” of e-harmony that matches immoral people together. That stated, that is also done on E-harmony. At least the other Christian websites advocate that you are to be single, and of Christian morality. E-harmony asked my “sexual activity” level during their sign up process, and I closed out of it immediately and said, “hmm….so Mr. Warren wants me to match with others who are “sexually as active” as I am? So basically, NCW is profiting off of not only Christian singles, but he is also profiting off of single people of other faiths. To me that is profiteering for money. His philosophy has been reviewed by Focus on the Family and FOF removed their support of E-harmony for these very reasons. I wrote FOF years ago, before they unsupported e-harmony, explaining what NCW was doing as a Christian businessman. A couple years later, FOF dropped their support. I don’t think it was just me complaining.
    I figure..yeah, so a non-Christian figures out how to make matches and make money off it, and I can more easily do that “online” service, because a non-Christian business man is not profiting nor encouraging people to find people of the same faith – thus having removed the “Christian” evangelism part of the equation in the dating realm. But for a Christian business man to profit off of needy people of all “faiths” and “moralities” deeply disturbs my conscience so as to ask…”so…is it ok to support pornography, sexual immorality – even if “homo or hetero”? That one question was enough of a warning light to me, that not one dollar of my money belongs in the pocket of that type of businessman, when he states he is a Christian “teacher” yet, profits off of immorality. Yes…he says he lost the “lawsuit”. I say, no…he didn’t lose the lawsuit, I think he possibly lost his soul in promoting such “sexual sin” and “faith advocacy” of promoting getting people together, and making money off it, when it has removed the righteous intention we should all have of bring people to Christ. I will celebrate the weddings of my friends of other faiths and religions, but I am not a Christian, to let them give me money to just let them “relationally find the love of their life” by paying a Christian to keep them in a false religion. That inconsistency really bothers me.

    • Inquisitive

      to clarify the statement “I am not a Christian”…what I mean is…Christians should be advocating sexual morality and evanglizing the lost, single or married, and to “match” people just on “love of their life”, ignores that principle of Christianity, and….I struggle to see that is how a Christian should ever act. Thus I said “I am not a Christian” but the better way to say it would have been “I am not acting like a Christian, to let them…to keep them in a false religion.” And that is why that inconsistency really bothers me. “A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.”

  • Kirsten B.

    I’ve tried many online dating options out there and I didn’t mind eHarmony. I agree, not knowing who are paying and non-paying members was frustrating, but it seems almost every other dating website are the same. I signed up as a non-paying member to check it out and was going to pay to get full access…until the day I was matched with my older brother!!! Needless to say, I did not continue with eHarmony after that!

  • Wesley Hague

    WAAAY to over priced.

    First of all when I tried Eharmony a number of years ago, I had like 0 interest in most of my matches. I’m a computer geek, I’m not all that interest in Sports, and while I’ve got nothing against going to a Gym, its not a place I would be looking for a date. I wanted someone who shared some interest with me, simply because I’ve gotten a lot of attitude in Christian Circles that I need to “grow up.” or “grow out of.” My interests in computers, and video games. Not to mention I’m fairly introverted. So when like 75% of my matches and their profiles made it sound like they were gym buffs, or sports nuts, I started closing off matches which mentioned gym in the first paragraph.

    The vast majority of the singles that I was willing to start communication with cause I could see some level of common interest, were probably not paying members. Most never made it through the 85 hoops you have to jump through to actually get to open communication. The only one time I made it through open communication, was intentionally rushed during a free communication weekend, only to feel deceived when I finally saw her picture. So then I made it a happen to close of all communication with those I could not see a picture of. (I some good photos of what I looked like). So between filtering out Gym addicts, no picture users, non paying memebers, well 0 of my matches I was getting were useful.

    I’ve tried signing up a few more times since then, and my matches still don’t seem to be all that compatible. I’m not perfect, but I want to have something in common with someone I’m trying to establish a relationship with online. Its hard enough to come up with someone to type half the time.

    • Ten

      I have to agree that it seems that most matches seems to be the sportive type. A good amount was into fitness/keeping in shape/outdoors/sports, etc. I made sure to make a side note that sport was not a cornerstone of my life (I usually just watch..) and that I was not the fitness type. I also added in my profile my more passive (and arguably nerdy) interests, like reading, sci-fi/fantasy and gaming.

      I did have people who showed interest, though it is of course unclear how much they actually read of your profile (do they read everything, just one page, glance through, just look at the pics, etc.). I also find it unclear how I was matched up with others. It only shows how much you match up with the optional questions you can answer in your profile.

      I personally found it slightly amusing that most who showed some interest went for sending a smile or some of the preset questions. It seems eHarmony is soaked in questionaires. Only a very small percentage wants to start exchanging messages from the get go. A shame, because that has my preference over answering mostly the same questions everytime. I miss the personal contact. On the other hand, it makes it easy to just ignore someone when you have not spoken with them anyway.

      eHarmony does become cheaper if you take a membership for e.g. 12 months. But the amount you have to pay to browse profiles anonymously is just silly. And it only lasts for a month.

      • Wesley Hague

        I’m not in a position where money grows on trees. While I would love to be dating, the fact that I have had in the past 2 one year subscriptions. That $500 on something that gave 0 results. The fact I was matched up with so many sports/fitness fanatics, meant to me that the 29 Degrees of Compatibility felt completely and utterly bunk. “I’ve got nothing in common with you” is probably one of my most common reasons for closing out matches upon reading a profile. For me the entire concept is entirely bunk. “I’m the professional… you should trust us, now fork over your money and I will hand you a couple pictures every month”

  • CC

    I agree with the main negative: less control than other websites, which means you really need to trust the website and the way it matches people. None of the matches proposed were appropriate for me, even though I don’t think I have too high expectations. In addition, it is overpriced and there is little value for money. Website setup and app were disappointing. At this price, I would have expected a better service.
    But the main put off is the auto renewal feature. Albeit embedded in terms & conditions, it is easy to miss (unless you’ve been warned by other people or already been tricked in the past). Just beware and don’t forget to turn it off before you get debited and renewed for the same length of time without any advance warning.

  • Jessica

    I had a very poor experience with EHarmony. I was on there for a year and had zero dates and zero communication outside the website. I had restricted my settings to religion/faith being most important and refused to budge on that setting as I have learned that being equally yolked is extremely important. At first, I was not too restrictive on my distance settings, but when 90% of my matches were all over the country, I changed my settings to give me only matches closest to me. (Wasn’t looking to start a relationship with someone 600 miles away). From then on, I received very, very, very few matches. I was lucky to get one every two weeks on average (maybe?). I live in the Pittsburgh area–it is by no means the size of NYC, but there is not a shortage of Christian singles here. After three months, I actually [futilely] tried to get my money refunded because I had received so few matches and had no outside communication with matches, let alone a date. I have been on other dating websites looking for Christian singles and had much more success in the a three-month span (outside communication and multiple dates). After I tried to get a refund, I actually think they may have fabricated some of my matches as I received two very similar matches right in a row with no picture (and the profiles were brief and eerily similar). (There also seem to be a large amoutn of matches with no picture. This makes me extremely nervous. Granted anyone can take a picture off of Google and display it as their profile picture, but still…) As my subscription continued, I tried to initiate contact with some of my matches that seemed compatible and I never heard back. This happened time and time again. (I do have to say, I was not completely sure their policy on profiles that were no longer active and thank you for clearing that up SingleRoots). I don’t expect every match to respond, but after a while, it just seemed completely strange and ridiculous. Needless to say by the end of my subscription, I couldn’t help but feel like I had been scammed and, honestly, felt foolish for believing all their spiels on compatability and caring about members finding matches. They talk a good game, that’s for sure. And to top it off, after I had subscribed, I heard very poor reviews on EHarmony. I should have done my research first before investing a good chunk of money into a dating website.

  • angelamy

    In case anyone is looking for more current reviews…I’d recommend you stay away from eHarmony. I live in the DC area. BIG area…lots of single folks to choose from. I don’t think it was overly picky with my criteria (“normal” person w/in 20 miles). Lots of matches at first. Then, after a month or so, the number started dwindling and ultimately was made up solely of matches that “slightly outside my requirements” . I stayed on the site for the full year. At the end of the year, I planned to cancel. End date got away from me. Sure enough, they renewed my subscription for another year. No warning (it was in the fine print) and no refunds. So…buyer beware. Wasn’t impressed by the matching process (even in an area as populated as DC) and was really taken aback when they hold true to the auto-renewal/no refund policy. If you join..track, track and track some more.

  • Jack

    I have to day of the dating sites eharmony has far and away been the worst experience for me. Their matching system completely ignores the filters from age range to wanting to children to denomination or even faith in Christ at all. I have tried a year membership once 9 years ago and once a year ago after being convinced by believing friends that said it was much better now, with the same lousy result. I am not a huge fan of match but it does a much better job in it matching system as does Christianmingle even Christian Cafe. In those two different 1 year stints I only every went on more than one date with one woman. It ignored age range and matched me many times with women 10-20 years older than me and 20 years younger rather than the age range I had set. Consistently there were more women out of my set age range than in it. Also, I am someone who would like to start a family some day and I was regularly matched with women that either had children and did not want any more or women who did not have children and did not want them. Oh and I can’t forget being matched up with buddists, taoist, agnositics and even an atheist. I realize some people have had success but I am definitely not one and am stunned that it got your top review for believers.

    • Mollie

      Jack, thank you for the specific info about frustrations with eHarmony…especially the heads-up of being matched with people from every religion. I’m researching these sites because friends/family have recommended them. But much of what I hear and see is disenchantment. Can God use these sites as a tool? – Yes! My friend just got engaged last week and met her fiance online. As a Christian who feels called to marriage and family, it often feels like the “good ones” are already married or looking elsewhere. So, how do we be proactive other than hanging out at bars…no thanks!, or moving to a bigger church with a larger singles ministry, or trying online dating with a wide pool of prospects? I really don’t know the answer to that, which is why I’m looking at options and surrounding this search in prayer. What I don’t want to do is be stuck, motionless, in fear when God calls me to take a step of faith. Nor do I want to jump at any and every option, “chasing after the wind” as the writer of Ecclesiastes says. Instead, I want my feet “fitted with the Gospel of peace” (Ephesians 6), relying on the Spirit’s intuition to know when/where to move and when to be still, simply standing my ground, watching and ready but PEACEFUL. Someone reminded me recently that “God is never early, but He’s always on time.” How frustrating the waiting can be! But how worth it in the end! One thing that encourages me is to look back over the past 10 years and see how different my life would be if I’d married fresh out of college as I’d have liked. Many relationships, opportunities for ministry, personal growth and adventures would not have happened. Jack, I’m writing this as much as a reminder to me as (hopefully) an encouragement to you. May God bless you with a wife who will enjoy family with you, who will make you laugh, hold you accountable, and walk beside you in faith. He’s the One who can direct you to her, whether or not He uses a website to do it.

  • Guest

    I signed up with eHarmony last week. I’m not a paying member yet. I wanted to look around and see if they actually had any members in my local area. Nevertheless, I set my preferences for men within a 30 year age range (which is pretty generous), any race, and within the entire USA. I still have not received any matches at all. By contrast, after signing up with ChristianMingle a month or two ago, and still not a paying member, I’m still receiving on average 3 new matches a day. Now, I don’t know if maybe eH just reserves the right to send matches to paying members only (okay, I can understand that), or ChristianMingle just has a larger database of local members in my area (since they advertise constantly on Fox News, and I live in a fairly conservative state). Still, I can’t rationalize spending $30 a month on up for a dating service that doesn’t provide matches. What would I be paying for? The pleasure of their blog posts? There are singles blogs I can read for free, so I don’t think eH is worth plunking down the plastic at this point…

  • Dissatisfied Customer

    I have to disagree. Eharmony may once have been a good site, but it is no more. It’s ridiculously expensive. Advertisements and even online features are misleading. Their customer service is worthless. You call and no one is authorized to do anything so you get referred to an email which they take days to resond to with nothing more than a scripted junk message. The quality of matches is a joke. Supposedly they don’t allow married individuals to subscribe, yet the first person I met I found out was married. Another turned out to be a pervert. Now after a month all the matches I get are inactive. Eharmony is only interested in getting your money. I suggest you spend it elsewhere!

    • Roger

      It’s bad enough that eHarmony misrepresents everything it advertises (every stat is a lie), it is pathetic that so called christen singles lie (ever hear of the 10 Commandments?). EHarmony is not the largest dating website, eHarmony has 60% less paid members than Match and even less active users than POF. EHarmony DOES NOT have 25,000,000 (gross lie) members. It has about 1,200,000 paid members at any one time. eHarmony marriage claims are utterly bogus. The claim is based on everyone who has ever subscribed to eHarmony over eHarmony history, whether or not the couple meet through eHarmony. eHarmony provides zero (0) customer service. EHarmony is nothing more than a dishonest zero service company. The most significant lie about eHarmony is ‘communication’ You can’t communicate with eHarmony. Shame on this site for lack of ethics and honesty. And eHarmony is NOT the oldest online dating site, Match is (formed in 1995).

  • Lindsey

    When I tried to sign up for eHarmony, after answering the super long and seemingly thorough questionnaire, I got this message:

    “We’re sorry — we are unable to find the right type of people for you

    This does not reflect on you personally or your chances of finding a happy relationship.
    Thank you for trying eHarmony; we wish you the best in finding a great relationship.”
    I had never heard of this happening before, so I googled it, and apparently the site rejects approx. 20% of the people who try to sign up, either because they are already married, gay, or depressed. I am none of those things, and I don’t have the option of checking over my answers to see if I accidentally wrote something wrong. Nor do I really want to, if I’m honest. I had heard good things about the site, but now I am thoroughly unimpressed.

  • guest

    Is the site as good for older singles as for twenty somethings?

    Do women on eHarmony still outnumber men something like 7 to 1?

    Could you also review,, and ?

    (The first 3 are English language sites, and QuimicaCristiana is in Spanish).


  • Mel Fogleman

    When I was ready to start dating again , everybody had advice on which dating sites I should try. So I originally signed up with But then friends recommended two free site, POF and Date Hookup. Thank goodness I did not have to pay anything for either of these site. Because you definitely get what you paid for. (NOTHING!) I take that back a whole bunch of losers/scammers. Since I was new at this on line dating, wasn’t exactly sure of how it was suppose to work. First, I signed up with Chemistry through one of the discount site, so I figured if it work, then great. I started a conversation with 1 match just after the first day of being of the site. But when never got a chance to meet, because he was always whining about the travel distance, which was about an 1 1/2 hrs. Then the next person I started a conversation turned out to be one of the biggest scammers on the internet. At this point I thought this is not for me, but still had a few paid months remaining on membership. So once while trying to log onto Chemistry, they were having technical difficulties and recommended that i visit one of their other dating sites, which turned out to be Match. So I was able to experience Match for a few days for free. So after my membership ended with Chemistry, I was offered a 1 month membership to Match at a discount, but what I didn’t realize was they were still charging me way after that month had ended. So luckily that credit card I used had expired because there’s no way to contact them or cancel your membership. Now I’m trying e-Harmony, they gave me a huge discount for several months. So far I am not impressed because the site/membership is to controlling for me. For me in comparison of the 3 different paid sites would be great if they could combine some of the good in each to make one great dating site. The main pros that I found with Chemistry and Match, is they give you the age range of your matches. This also helps that you can do your own search because if there was someone out of my age range, then I wouldn’t waste my time winking at them. With e-Harmony they send me matches, that I have no knowledge of their age requirement. So for those of you that are signed up with E-harmony, the quote “that it isn’t you”, may apply because you have many people that are delusional in the age range. So I’m trying to be positive and see where this leads: and there’s always the old fashion way of meeting people face-to-face. Good Luck to you all in your searches.

  • Linn

    Do not, do not, do not sign up with eharmony or upgrade with POF unless you enjoy having money stolen out of your bank account. Their business practices are outrageous. I wish I had read reviews before considering using their sites. Both use trickery to upgrade your account for a longer period than you intended the moment you click to pay. You won’t notice it until your bills start coming in. Eharmony increased my 3 month subscription to 1 year without me noticing it and POF increased my 2 month upgrade to 6 months. Luckily, I caught the POF trickery immediately and cancelled before any payment could go through. They threaten you with never being able to have an account with them again if you stop, cancel or delete an account. Oh, boo hoo. So many complaints out there regarding eharmony stealing money beyond the subscription length and not being able to stop auto renewal. Seriously, how do they stay in business and why haven’t there been any investigations into the business practices of online dating services? Please beware. I wish I had known.

  • Tammy

    EHarmony is the WORST dating site I’ve visited. Moving through the site…. There is no moving through the site! You can only move through the site If you ask someone a bunch of questions. If they ask you questions you cannot view their profile you only have the option of viewing a picture that is the size of a pea. And forget about looking for yourself and just sending a quick hi to see if they are interested. AND all this for a small fortune which you are tied too. They will not allow you to cancel. AND they won’t let you in unless you commit to at least 3 months. DO NOT WASTE YOUR MONEY! POF is a lot more flexible and easy to use!

  • Liza

    Here’s a tip…if you were a paying eHarmony member, but deactivated your paid account, just wait for a couple years…they might eventually send you an offer that’s actually worth looking into. I’m on there right now for $6.95 per month. Yeah, I had to sign up for 3 months to get that deal, and if I don’t cancel at the end of three months, they’ll keep charging my credit card $6.95 per month until I do, but it’s a steal of a deal compared to the full price.

    That said, I’ve had no luck in the past three months. I’ve initiated literally dozens of conversations (mostly through the guided communications option), with almost no replies. A few guys contacted me the first month I was on there, but none have in the past two months. Only about 3 of the guided communications reached the eHarmony mail stage, and only one of those led to a phone call (which didn’t lead anywhere else.) I don’t know if most of the profiles I’m sent are of non-paying members who can’t respond, or if my profile and/or photos are really just horrible. I usually get up to 12 matches per day. Of course, I don’t contact all of them, but I contact everyone who seems like a decent match!

    EHarmony might have been a great dating site in the past, but if they don’t do something about the massive number of non-paying, non-participating members, those of us paying good money to be on there are communicate with others will eventually leave. I may stay through Christmas and New Years just because it seems like people might join around those holidays (nothing like a family get-together or office party to remind you that you don’t have a special someone with you!), but it’s unlikely I’ll stay beyond that.

  • Greg

    I think I might prefer going through another painful divorce to trying to set up a profile on eHarmony. It is just THAT much trouble. I’ve had less painful dental appointments. And people can say what they want, but I’ve met more genuine Christians of the opposite sex on okCupid AND Tinder than I ever did on my ill-fated several months of agony on eHarmony years ago.

  • Josh S

    This is your only review where you don’t offer any personal experience. It’s almost like you guys haven’t even tried this one. It’s weird, because you do a great job explaining how each of the other sites worked for you… except the one you most highly recommend. It’s very strange and probably keeping your commissions lower than they could be.
    After reading your reviews, I’d be more inclined to sign up for Crush, or Mingle over eH. Maybe even Cafe, given the price difference and the longer free trial period.

  • Craig K

    First, if you are interested, there is a 3 month trial period after you get on the mailing list for low price like 7$ a month for 3 months. So I think worth trying for 3 months. After 3 months they started running out of local lades for me. I started sending out women from a
    wider and wider radius. I am in Dallas area with a population of 5 million.

    The good, is a slow process of meeting
    people with sending out questions. Great for shy people. There are a few matches
    each day so you don’t get overwhelmed. Good quality people, the first lady the
    email me was a blond MD. (she ghosted me after month said too busy) I think
    there would be less scammers on this site. Send matches from outside your area
    so much more likely to meet someone from a different state.

    Now some of the bad… Lack of Instructions
    on how to use the site like “Blocking”, You are to block people that write to
    you if you’re not interested. So lack of how to use site. Next, they ask 1230
    plus questions. The questions have little to do with matching. (Smoke and
    mirrors) There were only a few question on sex and kissing.(I think 2 questions
    on sex… this is a dating site people have diverse options on the subject) Most
    questions have nothing to do with finding a mate like “Who is your
    favorite James Bond?”… Who cares? Some questions girls would answer one
    way and boys the other way. Like how much would you spend on a pair of jeans? Or
    haircut? I think the questions are a
    distraction to you so you stay in eHarmony longer. Also, after you answer all
    the questions, you don’t get a personal profile and any kind of questions
    categories and can only view limited answers of other people. (See Okcupid for
    better view questions). Most of the matche they sent me had only answer a few
    questions. Blue and green matches. The blue matches are good matches. Green “out
    of your settings” The only blue matches I get seem to be local people that did
    not answer the questions. Like all dating sites, there are lots of complaints
    about money and forget about refunds on any dating site.

    The Searching is nonexistent. For example, say I want to find someone who likes tennis or sailing, two sports I love. No Keyword search. Also, they don’t think similar interest are a good matching criteria, I beg to differ.

    Lots of non-active profiles. I think I responded to about 1 out of 14 ladies. Very few responded back. They have the weekend for free specials to add to data base, but most don’t stay. It also just says “Christian” but what kind of Christian? allows
    you to put tag lines in the some areas including religion. Also, notice the largest Denomination is not listed Roman Catholic.
    Final notes: make sure your settings are to allow matches “slightly out of your settings”.
    Ladies, 80 percent of the contact is made by the men per eHarmony. Feel free to like us, wink Site is overpriced. IMHO

    • Rae

      I signed up for eHarmony many, many, years ago. I went through all the motions and ended up constantly getting 0 matches. I kept getting the not compatible message and I lived in NY. Isn’t that just what a single person wants to hear from a site that has men all over the country that you are not compatible. I made it through to communication once and when he found out I was a black woman he ended all communication. The site is way to expensive to receive no matches and to not have some control over what you are paying for. Frankly I can ask the same questions they do to a potential person. Why all the mystery?
      I have tried Christian Mingle and Christian Café. I met more potential matches on those and even got as far as meeting face to face they just didn’t work out and I am not sorry for it but at least I met some potentials and paid way less. Basically at the end of the process I didn’t feel cheated out of my hard earned money like I did with e Harmony. If eHarmony does allow for same sex relationships then that isn’t the Christian dating site for me because any man who would be willing to be on such a site would not share my Christian beliefs.
      I haven’t been on a dating site in years but if I were to try it out again it would be with either Christian Café or Christian Mingle. I found their process easier and the sites to me weren’t difficult to navigate at all. I like all the options they offer. What is so hard about choosing what your looking for and where you want to find it. LOL
      One thing eHarmony doesn’t allow for that Christian Mingle and Christian Café do allow for is the opportunity to make some other like minded Christian friends. Yeah we go to the site with the hope of meeting someone but I see nothing wrong with meeting some other Christians in the process, who knows they might have a friend that could work for me. 🙂