Today marks the 40th time I’ve posted for SingleRoots and almost a year since I was blessed with the opportunity to provide a voice for a project that I wholeheartedly believe in. It’s been a year of dramatic change yet my job, residence, church, and relationship status have all remained the same. Nevertheless, these 12 months have been a catalyst to tremendous discovery and growth in my life.
The Lord has imparted some nuggets of wisdom to me during this time that I believe are beneficial for everyone:
Writing – Be it prose, poetry, blog posts, song lyrics, prayers, or short, simple drivel-infused chicken scratch that only you can read, I implore you to write. You don’t have to write every day or even every week or a certain length or anything that’s of any significance to anyone but you. You write to record the discoveries and landmarks that are found in this journey and revel in the achievement of being able to look back over time and chart your growth. Like a mom with a phone book on her son’s head marking every inch on the wall he grows taller, you write.
Giving – Solomon wrote in Proverbs 3:9 to give the first fruits of all our produce. Our covenant with God may have changed, but his nature has not and his Word clearly illustrates a Father that has called us to worship him with the first fruits of our labor. Faithfully give the first 10% to your church, and He will provide you not only a heart to give to others over and above your tithe, but He will also bless you with the means to do it. We are blessed to be a blessing.
Serving – Just as money is a form of worship, so is your time and purpose. Within 10 years, I plummeted from a hopeful high school salutatorian with big dreams to a self-loathing burnout with little drive or career path. However, I’ve quickly re-discovered passion with the simple purpose of serving people as a reflection of the Son of the living God who gave His life to serve me. The Lord has called you to view your life as a resource for His eternal Kingdom, not a finite window of opportunity to pursue self-satisfaction. Yet by looking through His lens, you will find ultimate satisfaction.
Friendships – True friends push you to God and attempt to view you through God. They encourage you when you’re down, extend grace when you’re wrong, accept you in spite of your shortcomings, are thankful for you in all your uniqueness, and you offer the same to them. True friends are few and far between. Of that number, even fewer will be around for longer than a season but they will be exactly what you need in that season. For each one, I am so thankful.
Relationships – There is no set formula for finding love. Sometimes it finds us. Until one of the two occurs, the first relationship is with Christ. In it we will find comfort and guidance while waiting/searching for a mate. Also, puppy love is as dangerous and deceitful as it is fun and natural. While you’re looking through rose-colored glasses at someone, you should be accountable to a God-fearing confidant that can provide honest wisdom and counsel. Lastly, seventh graders get excited about changing their Facebook relationship status, but that doesn’t mean you should too.
Singleness – I no longer regret my singleness, and no matter the circumstances, neither should you. You don’t owe anyone an apology for it. I’ve learned that I’m single because I’m single—because that’s the path my life has taken. View that path as a gift through which the Lord can more clearly reveal Himself to you without distraction rather than a punishment for your mistakes or shortcomings. A desire for a companion is a God-given one, but until He gives you one, search for wholeness in his Truth.
Most importantly, I’ve come to better know and understand the nature of my Father, the Creator of the universe. I am in awe of Him. He is the same Father that said to Jesus, “This is my Son, in whom I am well pleased,” and He looks to me with the very same fondness. His magnificent nature, His infinite wisdom, and His endless love are deeper and more complex than I will ever understand. Each morning He meets me where I am, no matter what I’ve done, no matter how I feel, and He simply asks me to trust in Him.
He is so great and yet He loves me. He loves you.
Blessed with the knowledge and understanding of such Truth, I can no longer be silent or complacent. If could I sum up all that I’ve learned over 12 months into just one word it would simply be, “Move.”
We must move.
*Photo credit: mezzoblue
About W. Brandon Howard
