The more technological our world becomes, the less sketchy meeting someone on the internet can be, so online dating tips for women might seem, upon first glance, a little out-of-date. But see, we’re not talking about ways to keep your story off a missing persons episode of Dateline NBC. You know how to handle that part, right?
What we are talking, though, are tips to keep in mind as you go through the process. If you’re going to do this online dating thing, and do it well, you have to keep the right mindset. So here are a few online dating tips for women—6 to be exact. Don’t worry, men, yours are coming. Ladies first, though.
1. You do not have to agree to a date every time you’re asked on one.
Sure, online dating might’ve opened up a whole new world for you. You might be getting multiple date offers each month, or even each week, but that doesn’t mean you have to answer in the affirmative. For the ladies who don’t have a problem saying “no,” this might not be an issue, but for you people-pleasing gals, it’s a good thing to remember. If you know he’s not right, it’s okay to nip things in the bud.
2. But say yes to someone.
Just as important as it is to say no, it’s important to say yes. Don’t let your fear keep you from going on an actual date. Conversations over email or text will only get you so far. And as nice as it is to wake up to a flirtatious text from a guy, it means nothing if you don’t gel in real life. So go on a date…or two or three or lots.
3. Get a friend to try it out with you.
It’s an old joke that girls can’t go to the bathroom without taking a buddy with them. While that might be more along the lines of younger girls, sometimes online dating is far less daunting when you’ve got a sidekick or a wingman. And no, we don’t mean someone to tag along on dates, but someone to talk things out with. Someone to advise you on whether or not you need to go out with a guy or someone who helps you with a post-date analysis. If you have a friend who’s dating online, too, it can make the process more fun. But remember to reign in the jealousy if her dating life takes off and yours doesn’t. Don’t make us Jesus juke you in this fun post and remind you that God hasn’t forgotten you. Because we will. Oh we so will…
4. It’s okay to go on a date with more than one person.
Kiss courting and Joshua Harris books goodbye, please. We’re not telling you to get involved in a serious relationship with multiple people. But if one match asks you out at the beginning of the week and another match asks you out later in the week—and you’re interested in both—then go. You won’t know anything about compatibility until you meet them and spend time with each in person.
5. Show your true self.
We know…every piece of online dating advice warns us about profile pics, but ladies, we are still struggling. You have got to be honest. Show your curves, show your braces, show your height, show it all. You’ll be far less nervous on the first date and far better off in the long run because you’ll know you are talking to a guy (or several guys) who is interested in you, the real you.
6. Set aside the fairy tale.
This is not just for online dating but for everything relationship related. We’ve been sold a bill of goods about what romance and love are supposed to be like, and we set ridiculously high expectations for guys–expectations that are unfair and problematic. You’ll never be pleasantly surprised by a guy or satisfied with his efforts if you’re expecting him to be writing you love letters like Noah Calhoun or bringing you a bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils like Joe Fox. Let those notions go, sister. Let them go. This isn’t about settling for someone who isn’t right for you but managing your unrealistic expectations and letting him surprise you with his pursuit.
What other online dating tips for women would you suggest?
Photo credit: ChrisMarchant