When I was a collegiate minister, I lost count of the number of college students who asked for help in their battle to overcome a pornography addiction. And I daresay the number of girls who asked for help surpassed the number of guys. From what I read and hear from others, the large number of girls was not exclusive to our ministry. It’s fairly normal these days.
In an effort to help my students and the adults who worked with them in accountability groups, I composed a list of resources that are helpful in the war against pornography. And as I worked on it, I realized it might be helpful to many of you.
I don’t know most of you personally, but I wish we could sit down over coffee and you could hear the sincerity in my voice when I remind you that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1). I’d remind you of the grace that covers your life, and the God who loves you and wants so much more for your life than for you to live in shame, guilt, and despair.
I’d remind you to not believe the lie that you’re the only one—we never are the only one who struggles with anything—and to remember that there’s nothing new under the sun.
I don’t wish I could have this conversation with you because there’s anything special about me. I just know the look of relief I’ve seen wash across my college students’ faces as they heard those Truths spoken over them. It breaks my heart to see how the Enemy has attempted to keep them in chains.
But since you and I can’t sit down one-on-one, here’s what I know: This resource list can help you, but the single biggest way I’ve seen the Spirit lift people out of their addictions is through accountability. Tell someone, friend. James 5:16 tells us that confession brings healing. Confess it to a person who is a safe place for you, remove the shame that the Enemy loves to keep you in, and allow them to pray for you and walk alongside you.
A Theological Understanding of Pornography Use
If you’re struggling to understand why porn is a big deal or if you’re thinking Christians are overreacting about it, you might want to check out Dr. Russell Moore’s sermon on “The Spiritual Consequences of Sexual Immorality.” Using 1 Corinthians 6:15-7:5 as his text, Moore warns that we cannot view our bodies as machines detached from spiritual consequences.
Local Bible Studies
Many churches offer Celebrate Recovery, a Christ-centered recovery program for all areas of addiction. If you don’t have a close friend to walk alongside you, CR is a great way to find people who understand. If your church does not, chances are a nearby church does. You can go on the website to find a CR near you. CR is a face-to-face ministry, and they don’t offer studies online. It’s centered around community, and all Bible studies are group-based. It is a hard, but good way to find freedom alongside a group of people who understand the very things you’re dealing with.
Similarly, Watermark Church in Dallas has developed their own Gospel-focused recovery curriculum called re:generation. Other churches across the nation host re:generation recovery groups. You can go here to see if one is offered in your area.
If neither of those recovery groups are available in your area, find some close friends to walk through Matt Chandler’s Recovering Redemption bible study. It, too, is a Gospel-based approach to recovery.
Internet Filters
XXX Church
X3 has been fighting pornography since before many people in the church realized the depths of the problem. On their site, you can find software for your PC and/or mobile devices. When you sign up, you’ll also submit email addresses for your accountability partners who will receive regular emails letting them know any questionable sites you’ve visited. While we really want to encourage you to find a local friend who can walk alongside you on a day-by-day basis (like is available through Celebrate Recovery or re:generation), we think these resources are great tools to help you further walk in freedom. Granted, nearly everything on the site is going to cost some money, but it’s good stuff.
Covenant Eyes
Along the same lines, but not quite as developed as X3 Church, is Covenant Eyes. They provide filters for your PC and/or mobile devices, and they send email reports to your accountability partners. Like X3 Church, the filters will require a monthly fee. But the thing about Covenant Eyes that is most worth mentioning—if you’re struggling with temptation, there’s a panic button you can push that will completely shut your internet down.
iOS Blocking
The screenshot is a few years old, but the directions still apply. You no longer have to worry about using an app to restrict your internet browsing. You can just follow Andrew Osenga’s instructions. It’s just that simple, and it really does work. Unfortunately, from what I understand, Android doesn’t have an adult content restriction, but you can whitelist sites that are acceptable for you to use, and that will eliminate your ability to access any other sites on your phone.
Phone App
Dirty Girls Ministries has an iOS and an Android app that allows women struggling with porn to have ready access to their tools, such as submitting prayer requests, listening to their podcasts, or working through their “90 Days to Wholeness” encouragement series. The app is $7.99, but it goes to support their ministry. For more information on Dirty Girls, check out our interview with the founder, Crystal Renaud.
Testimony
Anne Marie Miller shares her story and how events in her life led to an addiction to pornography. Anne is a minister’s daughter and a woman–2 things that people naively don’t associate with porn addictions. In these two posts, she shares some of her story and about the power of confession in fighting against pornography addictions: “[Part 1] The Preacher’s Daughter & the Youth Pastor–My Introduction to Sexual Abuse and Pornography” and “[Part 2] Fighting My Addiction to Pornography (and Giving the Gift of Going Second!).”
What other resources are effective in the battle against pornography?
