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Dear Dad :: I’m Still Learning to Trust You

Sundi Jo Graham

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Sundi Jo Graham

Editor’s Note: If you’ve read SingleRoots long enough, you’ve probably read at least one post by our friend, Sundi Jo. This week, her book Dear Dad was released, and we’re excited to see her dream come to fruition. It’s a story–Sundi Jo’s story–of gritty redemption. In letters to her deceased father, she shares her struggles with relationships, addiction, abuse, security, and a host of other areas. It is a worthy read for anyone who has struggled with trusting God through the pain and the questions that seem to have few answers. Today, Sundi Jo shares an excerpt from the book along with a devotional about trusting God instead of ourselves. You can read more about the book and purchase a copy at the Dear Dad website.

Dear Dad :: I'm Still Learning to Trust You

“You have trusted in your wickedness and have said, ‘No one sees me.’ Your wisdom and knowledge mislead you when you say to yourself, ‘I am, and there is none besides me.’” (Isaiah 47:10)

From Dear Dad…

I woke up this morning to this verse. I find myself wondering why I counted on myself and not God. I got scared and stopped trusting Him.

After I cried out to you and still had the dreams, I didn’t know what to do. I’m sorry that I left you. I don’t want to handle things on my own anymore. Too many times I have trusted in my own wickedness. Too many times I have gotten caught up in my own desires and my own sin that I thought I was the only one who could see me. Forgive me.

We love to be in control, don’t we? (Stop shaking your head no, you know it’s the truth.) Being in control, or the perception thereof, seems safer.

I often find myself wanting to just do things myself because then I know they’ll get done and I don’t have to trust others to do it. I do this with God, too. Whether it’s with our jobs, our marriages, or even our nightmares, which was my case, we want to handle things our own way.

Can you remember a time when you thought you could do a better job than God in your current situation? How did that turn out for you? I can’t think of a time when my ideas were better than His.

As you read the above verse again, ask God to show you where in your life you’re trying to trust in yourself instead of Him.

Just a side note for you to picture what happened later that day: I had my therapy session in an RV. Yes, that really happened. Someone call Jeff Foxworthy.

Where in your life are you trusting in yourself too much?

 

Photo credit: nimetimesthree

Filed Under: Relationships, SingleRoots, Spiritual Growth Tagged With: Dear Dad, redemption, SundiJo, trust

Sundi Jo Graham

Sundi Jo is a speaker, author, and founder of Happylujah and Esther's House. She blogs at sundijo.com and her latest book, Dear Dad, released in Spring 2013. Find her on Twitter (@sundijo).

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